Vaisnava Family Resources is the educational and networking website of the North American Grihastha Vision Team.

 

Our mission is to strengthen, enliven and support spiritual family life. Some of the Purposes of the GVT are to provide premarital and skill-building training, to offer courses, workshops, and publications to support family life, and to train mentor couples in many centers. This issue features Family Love and Affection, one of the GVT's 12 Principles and Values.
 
Last May at the Festival of Inspiration, in New Vrindavana, the GVT held a  4 hour Vaisnava Marriage and Family Fest. The purpose of this fest was to offer courses on strenghening families, to hear what our youth feel about the institution of marriage in Iskcon and to honor some long term happily married couples. We also had a fabulous comedy by Yadunath and Beth on grihastha life.
 
Why appreciate devotees who have honored their marriage vows and stayed together for many years? Because lack of commitment in marriage results in multiple relationships and all the associated problems that ensue wtih a broken marriage.

Honoring marriage vows is an austerity and needs a culture to support and encourage this. Otherwise couples will not be able to maintain the determination that is required to work through the hurdles that come with the various challenges of marriage. While there are extenuating circumstances that justify separation or divorce, most marriages can be helped and couples can progress together in their Krsna Consciousness. Healthy happy relationships benefit the individuals, the children,the devotional community and the greater society. 

We will be holding the Vaisnava Marriage and Family Fest again in May of 2010 and would like you to think of any exemplary couples you could nominate to be appreciated at our fest. Please send names along with their email contacts to gvisionteam108@yahoo.com.

Upcoming Events

 

 

 

To Join us simply call: 712-432-0111, participant access code:  761698#

 

We will be giving an opportunity to ask questions live to GVT member Krsnanandini devi dasi, Certified Family Life Educator.

 

 

Picture this:  Srimati devi comes home from school one afternoon so quietly that her mother

senses a problem.  “Srimati”, she calls, “Are you okay?  How was your day?”, When she

doesn’t hear a response, Sudevi, Srimati’s mata goes to the ten year old’s  bedroom, takes

one glance at her daughter’s tearful face and hugs her.  “Mata, today some of the children

in my class said I was crazy because I don’t eat meat.  One girl put a meat sandwich in my

face and I pushed her away from me.”  The teacher gave me a detention.  

Sudevi comforts her daughter and they talk a little about Krsna, about animals, about how

all life is sacred and about how sometimes, because of ignorance, people say and do mean

things.  Mostly though, she uses this time to show affection and to nurture her daughter and

the stand she has taken to see the life in animals as sacred, too.

Imagine a new devotee, Bhakta Ted, ...(continue reading)

Dear Grihastha Coach

Dear Grihastha Coach,

We have three children and are somewhat isolated in a small suburban community about 45 minutes from the nearest temple.  My husband works and I am a stay at home mother.  We try to make it to the weekly temple programs.  Other than that, we don’t really have much association with other Vaisnavas.  My husband’s job is consuming.  By the time he gets home, he’s exhausted and I am frustrated because I have been with the children all day long.  Our marriage is under fire and our Krsna consciousness is somewhat also.  What do you recommend?

Waiting for your help,

Dear Waiting,

We recommend a time-out.  Just like when your child has pushed limits and you are frustrated with them, you give them a time-out where the child takes a short break or rest from play.  Sit down with your husband and ask if he would be willing to take a 2 day break with you.  Try to find someone you trust who can care for the children for 2 days and you and your husband spend some time together – on the first day, do some chanting, praying, reading, playing, walking and talking to one another face to face.  Then take time on the second day to do some planning for how to inject just one or two things different in your busy schedules.  Plan for or create a schedule where for at least 20 minutes every day, after the children are in bed and you and your husband set goals, review the day and offer some appreciation of each other.  (See the article about victorious, validation language and other really helpful articles that are full of suggestions on the GVT website:  www.vaisnavafamilyresources.org.)   When you go to the temple, try to connect with other mothers or devotees with whom you can establish devotional friendships, even they are at a distance.  Actively pursue devotional friendships, they are invaluable.

The synergy of relationships is such that when husband and wife are serving Lord Krsna in harmony despite all challenges, this cooperation results in positive consequences much more than you or he working independently or separately.

 Take care.

Your Grihastha Coach

Tip of the Month

Tips for Promoting Family Love and Affection

by Mantrini devi dasi

One of the best ways to promote family love and affection is to express our appreciation for the sacrifices we make for one another. A quick, but sincere 'thank-you' for any service rendered is always appreciated. Even better is an expression of gratitude for the roles we play in each other's lives. To one's spouse we can say, 'I really appreciate how hard you work to (keep this family together'take care of the children'keep the house clean'bring in a steady income). It's not an easy task and I often take it for granted. I don't always thank you for that, and I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate it.'

This works for children as well. Children respond positively to expressions of gratitude, as well as benefiting in the long-term by seeing good role models of love and affection. Actually, the more we thank our family member for what they do, the more we cultivate a mood of gratitude in ourselves. And the more we stay in 'gratitude,' the easier it is to see how Krishna is working in our lives for our benefit. This helps us withstand those inevitable life events that seem negative or unwanted.

The devotees of the Grihstha Vision Team pray that all readers will be inspired to be the best that they can in their ashram, that they choose to execute their responsibilities with love and that if they need help, to please contact us at  gvisionteam108@yahoo.com